


Superhero Engagement

by arrafrost



Category: Deadpool (Comics), Deadpool - All Media Types, Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Prostitution, Identity Reveal, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-08
Updated: 2016-03-08
Packaged: 2018-05-25 11:07:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,933
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6192655
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/arrafrost/pseuds/arrafrost
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Weird question, but do your… escorts accept jobs where the clients are also wearing a costume and maybe want to wear the mask during the… engagement?” </p><p>Wade had found the number for the agency in a pile of magazines that had sort of… fallen over on him during a gunfight. Therefore he deserved to call the phone number on a page where there were a lot of good looking barely dressed men who were wearing sexy versions of the local superheros.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Superhero Engagement

“Weird question, but do your… escorts accept jobs where the clients are also wearing a costume and maybe want to wear the mask during the… engagement?” **  
**

Wade had found the number for the agency in a pile of magazines that had sort of… fallen over on him during a gunfight. He won. But he also got himself temporarily pinned underneath the very heavy shelf unit and it was easier to lie there and shoot the last three guys through the skull than to struggle to get out and earn himself a few more wounds that he would have to heal from. And also a bashed in skull that takes longer to heal from. The guy had an abnormally large hammer. What was this? A video game? A Harley Quinn comic? He did not have time for crossovers right now.

He did, however, had time to lay back and flip through a few magazines. He felt he deserved that break. Wade also thought he deserved to call the phone number on a page where there were a lot of good looking barely dressed men who were wearing sexy versions of the local superheros.

“You wouldn’t happen to be a superhero calling our agency would you?” The feminine voice sounding suspiciously like someone named Michele seemed cautious, like they would love that but were also wary of the kind of press that might bring.

“Not technically? More of an… anti-hero? The Avengers refuse to return my phonecalls and I refuse to return the X-Men’s phone calls.”

“Okay, what are you looking for?”

“Gotta say this Spidey-lad on the advert is rather enticing.”

“Ah yes, let’s see…” There was a pause on the other end and Wade continued to worm his way out from underneath the shelves. “We have no Spideys available at the moment, was there another time you were interested in?”

“Oh, oh yeah right now is…” He stared down at his slightly squished torso and hips. There were dents in his flesh and bones. “Less than optimal. Uh let’s see this damage should take about… how about Wednesday?”

“Wednesday…?”

“Uh… afternoon?”

“We have one free from two in the afternoon until four.”

“Not anymore. Can I register under Deadpool?”

There was another pause. “Do you wear a red suit?”

“Um… it’s so bad guys don’t see me bleed?”

“One moment please.”

He made a mistake. They were never going to offer him their services now. He’d been on the news recently, quite a few deaths. All drug lords and bad dudes but many were decapitated. The press does not quite enjoy that.

“Weapon play is not welcome.”

“Oh, right. Wouldn’t dream of it. Those are kept in my special box. Which is quite different from my sex box. That one has unicorns on it.”

“Right.”

Another pause.

“He has agreed to meet with you at The Mark hotel. I will need to take down _all_ of your information.”

“Oo, fancy five star.” Lucky Wade was getting paid quite the pretty penny for this job he literally just finished. He was getting paid tomorrow.

.

.

Wade paced around the hotel room rather nervously. He’d already slipped into the robe… over his outfit. He brought no weapons, as requested, which felt rather awkward but his enemies were unlikely to look for him in such a swanky hotel.

A soft knock on the door made him stop moving. A male escort dressed as his favorite superhero crush however…

He opened the door and was greeted with a strikingly similar mask to Spidey’s original mask. He’d only ever worked with the real Spidey a few times and even though it wasn’t exactly working with more like… he was doing things and Spidey tried to stop him or Spidey was doing things and Wade decided to join him and Spidey complained about it the whole time.

“Did you walk in here with that mask on?” Wade couldn’t help but ask because the hotel wouldn’t even let him in here until he took off his own mask. They regretted it. But they did ask him to remove his mask.

“I put it on in the hall before I knocked.”

Wade furrowed his brows at the boy’s voice. It wasn’t familiar but it didn’t seem quite right.

“Ah, makes sense. Um… come in?”

“Thanks,” the Spidey-escort walked inside, his hips swaying in the most enticing way that had Wade’s mouth watering. This was going to be a miraculous two hour engagement.

“I expect you followed protocol and don’t have any weapons on you.” Spidey asked once Wade closed the door.

“I wouldn’t use them on you even if I had them.”

“Good.” Spidey nodded and took off his coat and pants revealing his… revealing outfit. It was comprised of only the red part of Spidey’s suit going down the front of him, cutting off into a g-string blue thong. The black spider and goggles were surprisingly accurate.

“Did you make that costume or are they all that accurate?”

“What?”

Wade slowly approached the Spidey-escort. “The costume is… it’s uncanny. Even the material looks the same.”

“We have costume designers at the agency. They must have a thing for authenticity.”

“Not many pictures of our friendly neighborhood Spider-Man though.”

“I’m sure there are enough. I don’t really follow the superhero trend, this is just my job.”

“Right. So why is this your job?”

Spidey kicked off his boots and laid himself out on the luxurious bed. Wade had already rolled around in it several times before Spidey got here. It was so _fluffy._

“Do you really want to waste your two hours on my backstory?” Spidey spread his legs and Wade groaned.

“No,” he said, moving over to crawl between those inviting legs. “But… I’m curious.”

“More curious about my history than about what’s underneath this thong?” Spidey-escort thrust his hips up and Wade nearly lost it.

“Oh you’re good,” Wade grinned, leaning his body into the movement and letting his face slid up the Spidey’s torso, breathing him in deep. “Just as I thought.”

“What?”

“You smell exactly like Spidey. There’s a weird smell in there, a cologne that does not blend well with your natural scent or the scent of this fabric - which is my main concern honestly.” Wade plucked one of his gloves off, revealing his rather unattractive (if you ask him) skin and the Spidey-escort didn’t even move. He barely flinched as Wade let his fingers caress the fabric of the suit from his neck all the way down to his belly-button. “Uh huh, just as I thought. Same fabric. So tell me… what is an actual superhero doing working for an escort service that has their men dress up like sexy superheroes?”

“I don’t know-”

“Spidey. You can lie to yourself but-”

“That’s really cliche, Wade.”

“Ah hah!”

Spidey must have rolled his eyes as he let his head fall back. “How did you find out?”

“I just told you.”

Spidey lifted his head, “What?”

“Design, smell, fabric. I’m a good detective. Plus you didn’t freak at my skin,” Wade wiggled his exposed fingers.

“You didn’t know before calling the agency?”

“No. Did you think I knew?”

“Not until you started going on about the similarities, no.”

Wade blinked, “Wait… that means… you accepted the job.”

Spidey’s head hit the bed.

“You knew! You accepted the job knowing it was me!”

“I… I didn’t think it was the real you.”

“Bullshit.”

“I… okay.”

“You want to sleep with me.”

“Wade, I accepted a job because it was offered and because I know you wouldn’t actually do anything to the other escorts. Also because I knew if I took the job it would guarantee you wouldn’t do anything to the other escorts.”

Wade crawled over Spidey’s body, planting his hands on either side of the hero’s face to hold him up. “You took the job because you wanted to.”

“I…”

“You want to have sex with me and you thought you could without me knowing it was actually you. The spider himself.”

“Fuck you, Wade.” Spidey growled, turning his head.

“You were gonna.”

Spidey turned his head back to look at the mercenary. “What makes you think I’m not anymore?”

That got Wade’s attention. He raised his eyebrow, leaned down and kissed Spidey on the lips despite both their masks getting in the way. It was a chaste kiss, barely a kiss all things considered, and then he pulled away, rolling off Spidey entirely. “Because I’m not going to sleep with you. I’ll still pay you, don’t worry.”

“Wade?” Spidey sat up, pulling his legs in so he was sitting cross-legged on the bed. That did… all kinds of things to Wade’s libido with how exposed it made his crotch but he resisted.

“You’re _Spider-man. The_ Spider-man. I can’t take advantage of you.”

“Pretty sure I came here of my own free will. This is what I do, Wade.”

“No, what you do is save people.”

“Also that.”

“Okay, backstory time. Don’t worry, it won’t waste the two hours, it’s what I want from this.”

Spidey sighed, leaning his head back to stare at the ceiling for a moment before turning back to Wade. “Do we really have to get into this Wade? I didn’t come here for this.”

“You came here because you wanted to see my cock, I know.” Wade paused and looked at his hand. “Which is rather unexpected. You do know that I look like this _all over,_ right? Not just my face and hands. Entire body. Ground up hamburger meat skin.”

“Wade.” Spidey cringed.

“I know, real gross stuff under here.”

“You’re hot. You’re just too self-conscious to realize.”

“I used to be hot, and I knew it. Now…”

“Still hot.”

“You just want in my superhero pants.”

“Yeah that’s sort of the point.”

“Oh… right.”

Spidey sighed once more, “Okay… I need money for college. I’m not like Stark or Cap. I don’t have my own money and I’m not funded by a secret government agency. I’m a vigilante, not a full fledged superhero. And the photos I’ve been selling to Jameson haven’t been raking in the cash.”

“Ah yeah that actually- wait. You sell _your own selfies_ to a newspaper? And they pay you? For your selfies? That is brilliant!”

“I know,” he could tell Spidey was grinning, “Genius over here.”

Wade laughed because he knew all about Spidey’s genius. How he made his web slingers himself, along with his costume, and how he managed to figure out how to handle so many situations without too much violence. Spidey was his role model in many ways.

“So… you’re not judging me are you?”

“What?” Wade snapped out of his thoughts, they took him places sometimes.

“For doing… this.” Spidey gestured down at this attire. The attire that was _still_ doing things to Wade’s libido.

“Oh no, sex work isn’t something to be ashamed of. Perfectly legitimate way to earn money, should be legalized and regulated if you ask me.”

“That’s actually not surprising.”

Wade shrugged, “I’m the least likely person to judge someone on their profession. Especially one of the oldest professions in the world, needs to be respected more and stigmatized less.”

“Does that mean you’re going to get back on this bed?”

“And have sex with the real life Spider-man?”

“That is what I’m referring to yes,” Spidey lifted his mask up to his nose, revealing his grinning lips.

Wade slowly climbed back onto the bed, settling over Spidey’s body and letting the vigilante lift up his own mask to the same extent. “Does this mean you’re finally gonna tell me your name?”

Spidey’s grin widened, “I dunno if you’ve earned that yet.”

“Oh. Oh it’s like that huh?” Wade asked, slowly moving down Spidey’s body, lips trailing along the outline of the sexy suit so he was kissing Spidey’s skin as well.

“Yeah, it’s like that.”

“Okay, we’ll see how you feel by the end of this,” Wade kissed Spidey’s inner thigh, letting his teeth scrape against his flesh before moving on.

“Uh huh, I think I’ll be fi-uck!” Spidey thrust his hips up into Wade’s face as the merc mouthed at Spidey’s crotch through the fabric of his thong.

“Mmhmm,” Wade mumbled, the vibration shooting through Spidey and making his groan. Wade sucked on the hero’s cock through the fabric before shifting the fabric out of the way and mouthing at the head of _the_ Spider-man’s cock. Spider-man’s cock was in his mouth. He was lapping at Spider-man’s dick with his tongue, tasting his pre-cum, feeling the weight of said cock on his tongue, feeling him twitch inside his mouth, and making him moan. He could die happy now if he could actually die. Which he couldn’t. And usually he did, but right now… life was pretty good.

“Fuck Wade!” Spidey moaned, lifting his hips as Wade deep throated him. Wade didn’t even try to hold Spidey’s hips down, just let him thrust into his throat like he had no gag reflex at all - which he really didn’t at this point. It was a useful skill. Spidey stopped himself after the first thrust and Wade grumbled around his cock, bringing his hands to grip Spidey’s ass and pull him up. Spidey took the very obvious hint and started lifting his hips to thrust into Wade’s mouth until he was coming down his throat with a loud moan.

Wade swallowed everything with minimal effort and licked his cock clean, who knew when he was going to get an opportunity like this ever again.

“So business is good then?” Wade asked nonchalantly as he licked around the head of Spidey’s sensitive cock.

“Shiit… yeah… yeah it’s fine, Wade. I’m making enough for uni, I work around my- omg remove your mouth please and let me rest a second - class schedule and have enough time for superhero things. I’m good at time management.”

“That’s good,” Wade grinned, flopping down next to Spidey on the king sized bed with deliciously comfortable sheets. “Because I intend to book your time again… if that’s okay with you.”

“Wade you couldn’t afford me on a regular basis. I don’t even know how you’re affording me now.”

“I’m using almost all of my money from the last job I did.”

“Ah.”

“But I can get more jobs with even more money.”

“Wade, you need to eat and pay your rent,” Spidey rolled over onto his side, propping himself up with an elbow.

“I have a blind lady taking care of half the rent and making Ikea furniture for me.”

“What?”

“Nevermind,” Wade waved his questions off, “The point is… I can afford you if I tried. And I am very good at making things happen when I want them to.”

“Uh huh,” Spidey nodded, rolling over onto Wade’s body, sitting up with a leg on each side of his hips as his fingers toyed with the bottom of Wade’s top.

“Are you prepped? Want me to shove a few fingers up there?”

“Ugh, I might want you to do that anyway, but yeah, obviously I’m prepped.”

“Hot.”

“Wade.”

“Yes… Sam? Sawyer? Scott?”

Spidey tilted his head at him in confusion. “I’m guessing your name.”

“Only ‘S’ names?”

“Spidey starts with an ‘S’.”

“My name does not start with an ‘S’ but you are welcome to keep guessing.” Spidey said as he rolled Wade’s pants down to his waist. “Commando, unsurprising.”

“I like the way the fabric feels against my cock.”

“Of course you do.”

“Oh…” Wade moaned as Spidey wrapped his hand around Wade’s rather hard cock that had been hard since before he’d even opened the door to let the escort in. “Oh yeah, I’ve always wondered how that fabric would feel around my cock. Glad you kept the gloves on.”

“Good to know, I was going to ask you if you wanted me to take them off.”

“Never take them off. Wear them forever. Wear them like you’re covering up a knife wound in the middle of your hand from a time you robbed a convenience store and inadvertently created an unstable vigilante.”

“What?”

“Nevermind, keep going.”

“Wasn’t intending to stop just… what?”

“Webcomic, you can google it later.”

“Okay…”

“Ah, that feels so niiice!”

“Do you know what would feel even better?”

“These sheets? They are five star quality. I am putting you up in a five star hotel, I’ll have you know.”

“Yes Wade, I am aware. But I was going to say my ass.”

“Oh,” Wade nodded, “Yeah… yeah that sounds like a better plan. Let’s go with your idea instead.”

“I thought so.”

Wade sighed and leaned back as Spidey moved down to the edge of the bed and pulled the pants off the merc’s legs before unhooking his own thong and letting it fall to the floor. Wade was a little sad at the loss, it really pulled the costume together and Spidey must have spent a lot of time on that, but if that’s how Spidey wanted it well… who was he to disagree?

On his way back up, Spidey caressed the inside of Wade’s legs, letting the merc feel the fabric of the gloves every inch of the way until Spidey was straddling his lap and slipping a condom onto the mercenary.

“This is a good look for you,” Wade remarked, keeping himself still as Spidey held onto Wade’s cock and positioned him just right.

“And for you, I bet you’re flushed under that mask.”

“You don’t really want to see.” Wade frowned.

“Oh, I actually do. I’ve wanted to see your face for a…” Spidey lowered himself slowly, letting the head of Wade’s cock slip into him with surprising ease - he must have lubed up exceedingly well. “… a long time. But only if you want to show me your face.”

“It’s the stuff of nightmares.”

“Wade.”

“Do you want to call Weasel? He has many things to say about this face, very creative things.”

“Oh fuck,” Spidey moaned, now fully seated on Wade’s cock.

Wade was barely keeping it together, biting the inside of his cheek to keep himself from bucking because _Spider-man was riding his cock right now._

“How is this real?”

“You do know ah-” Spidey slowly lifted his hips, “I can see half your face already and I’m not- fuuck,” Spidey sank back down. “Turned off. In fact, I’m _very_ turned on.”

“Don’t try to sweet talk me Spidey. I gotta keep some secrets from you, just like you’re keeping from me.” Wade took this opportunity to grip Spidey’s waist and thrust his hips up. Spidey gasped, bracing himself by leaning over and gripping Wade’s shoulders. It didn’t seem like he was expecting this, which is why Wade rolled them over, wrapping his arms around Spidey’s back and pressing him into the ultra-comfy mattress with hard, long thrusts.

“Holy fuck, Wade! Harder!”

“Huh.”

“Hard- wait, huh what?”

“You swear during sex, I just noticed that.”

“You just… why is that -” Spidey gasped as Wade lifted both his legs to get a better angle, “Important?”

“Because you have never sworn on a mission before. I’ve heard you say mother-hugger.”

“Yeah I… I don’t- ah shit! Doesn’t matter right now. Fuck me harder!”

“You got it boss,” Wade grinned, slamming his hips against Spidey as he held his legs up for the best angle.

Spidey gripped the sheets in his gloved hands as they rocked the bed - luckily not into the wall because this was a classy hotel - and tried his best to move his hips into Wade’s thrusts. It was rather difficult considering the angle Wade had put him in, but Spidey was quite flexible, perks of being a superhero.

“Wade… Wade I’m gonna…”

“Come on, baby boy. Come for me.” Wade purred, grinding his hips against the hero before pulling almost all the way out and slamming back inside. “Can you come from just my cock or do you want-”

“No! No don’t touch, I want to… faster. Move faster.”

Wade did as commanded, he picked up his pace. He may have been paying for this experience, but he was going to give Spidey the time of his life. It already was more than he could ever hope for, so now he just had to make things better than Spidey could have hoped for.

And he had hoped for it. He had accepted this booking knowing it was him. Knowing he was going to be sleeping with Deadpool.

Wade slowed down.

“Wade! Come on! Fast-” Spidey paused, mouth opening in surprise as Wade reached up to pull off his mask. His face was revealed for Spidey to see and they both stopped moving. Spidey tilted his head, taking in the appearance he was greeted with and Wade tried his hardest not to look away in shame.

Then Spidey reached up, hand slipping around the back of Wade’s neck to pull him down into a passionate kiss. It was pure bliss. Wade only knew because he’d felt this way exactly once before. It didn’t last… those moments never lasted, but Wade was going to savor this kiss and the feeling that rushed through his body.

He started moving faster, kissing Spidey back with as much intensity as he could muster until Spidey finally broke the kiss to moan and gasp and exclaim that he was coming. His entire body shook around the merc, fingernails digging into his skin as he clung to him through his orgasm. Wade followed shortly after, burying his face in Spidey’s neck, grunting and moaning soundlessly as he filled the condom up with his come.

“Holy…”

“Goddamn, Spidey that was…”

“Peter.”

“Huh?”

“My name.”

Wade blinked, lips pressing into Spidey’s collarbone. “That was amazing, Peter. Can I call you Pete? Petey?”

“You can call me whatever the hell you want after that.”

“Okay baby boy,” Wade grinned, wrapping his arms around Peter’s body as he let himself relax on top of him.

“You’re heavy though…”

“Uh huh… you have super strength.”

“Roll over to the side and I’ll let you spoon me.”

Wade grinned, “Deal.”

They both sighed as they settled into a comfortable position, Wade arms around Peter, holding him closely. Wade had pulled out and disposed of the condom and their breath was in sync.

“So… when are you free next?”

Peter grinned, “You’re going to have to call the agency to figure that one out aren’t you? I’m Spidey number three by the way.”

“Whaaaat? Not Spidey number one?”

“Two other guys got there before I joined the agency.”

“Ah… I suppose that makes sense. But you’re number one in my books.”

Peter laughed, craning his head to look back at Wade and kiss him on the chin. “That’s not surprising.”

“You know… you’re still wearing your mask.”

“I am,” Peter nodded, holding Wade’s gaze through his goggles (or so Wade imagined).

“I took my mask off.”

Peter paused, lips curling into a smirk, “I told you my name.”

“I already told you my name.”

“Wrong, Colossus told me your name when we all met one day.”

“Ah damnit steel nuts!” Wade grumbled, “Fine, tit for tat. Next time I’ll get you to take off your mask.”

“Will you? What will you offer?”

Wade whispered into Peter’s ear, letting his fingers caress down Spidey’s chest as he did.

“Oh… oh that might work.” Peter grinned as he rested his head on the pillow, snuggling back into Wade’s embrace. “You’ve got thirty-three minutes left…”

“Let’s just cuddle for now… then use the remaining two minutes and forty-five seconds for round two.”

Peter snorted, “Sounds like a plan.”


End file.
